Random House: Happiness Boosting Tips from Poppy Jamie

The Happy Not Perfect Author

Talks Mental Health

Dear Reader,

Even before the pandemic brought on a crushing wave of stress, anxiety, isolation, and financial struggle, there was a growing mental health crisis—exacerbated by a digital-first culture that is putting untold pressure on a generation of young people.

I have made it my life’s mission to do something about this and share the actionable, science-backed solutions we can all use to rewire our daily thoughts and break damaging patterns for good—those same ones that I used to piece myself back together after suffering from chronic anxiety and burnout.This Mental Health Awareness Month I’m pleased to share 5 simple exercises you can begin to incorporate into your routine right away, and in my new book, Happy Not Perfect, you’ll discover my complete “Four-Step Flex Framework” that will enable you bend and stretch your negative thought pathways into better shape, unravel your emotional blockages, raise your energy levels, move through challenges with confidence and create a life aligned with your deepest values and aspirations. My goal is to equip you with the tools, knowledge, and methods you can use to navigate your hardest days; become adaptable; re-write old habits and fears; and snap you out of autopilot to start building a brighter future.Life will never be perfect, and our happiness lies in the beautiful acceptance of that.

Happy Not Perfect is about digging deeper into our psyche to heal the root of our thinking because we all carry emotional wounds, micro or macro, and taking the time to understand the root of the stories we tell ourselves is essential to rewriting new scripts moving forward.Xo PoppyP.S.

If you want to learn more about Happy Not Perfect, visit poppyjamie.com and

connect with me on Instagram @poppyjamie where I regularly share happiness tips and exercises.

5 TIPS TO BOOST YOUR MENTAL HEALTH

1. Hit Reset on Your Habits: When we consciously decide to wake up to our autopilot patterns, only then can we choose to bend and shift them. List three habits you’ve set-and-forgotten that you would like to reset into better ones. Mine are looking at Instagram first thing in the morning and when I’m bored, saying “I’m sorry” when I have nothing to apologize for, and eating when I’m stressed.

2. Start Micro-Energizing: Right now, are you slumped over, head down, staring at your phone or laptop? If so, you’re more likely to be self-critical and reactive to a threat because our thinking is influenced by our physical bodies and vice versa. Try these micro-energizers to help build healthier thought habits:

• Stand up
• Do ten jumping jacks
• Dance to your favorite song
• Stretch your arms over your head

3. Tone Your Vagus Nerve: Belly breathing stimulates the vagus nerve, which controls the parasympathetic nervous system and regulates your heart rate and mood. Researchers in Switzerland have found that a well-toned vagus nerve can reduce inflammation, treat depression and PTSD, and tamp down stress and anxiety. All of these benefits can be accessed just through breathing.

4. Change Your Words, Change Your Narrative: Use language to your advantage and retell your past story in a way that empowers you. This is a very powerful exercise because your brain believes everything you tell it. Replace unhelpful words like “failure,” “screwup,” and “disaster” with the word “unexpected.”

5. Use the Friend POV: Have you noticed that we always know how a friend should handle their situation, but we’re stumped when it comes to our own? When we are talking to ourselves, our emotional brain is activated but when we’re advising a friend, our analytical brain is activated. Practice using the third-party friend voice in aspects of your life you may be struggling with.

READ AN EXCERPT

My quest for happiness and to finally feel good enough, caused my mind, heart and soul to collapse on the journey. It was only when I was lying in a hospital bed due to exhaustion, broken by chronic anxiety, and feeling like I was wrapped in an iron blanket, did I reluctantly consider whether the road I’d chosen had led me straight to discontentment, stress, fear, self-rejection and illness.Only then did I start to realize my mind was the culprit. The time had come for me to confront my cruel inner critic and open up the dungeon of emotions I’d kept locked away for so many years. Not knowing what I would find, I was terrified to do so. I knew I had a clear and important choice to make: I could continue abusing myself, blaming other people for making me feel less-than and continue on this destructive path of happiness/success = perfection, or I could change direction.

Change begins with learning, and that’s exactly what I did. I tracked down every expert I could find in neuroscience, psychology, mindfulness and ontology (philosophy about the nature of being) to understand why I was so compulsively horrible to myself and how I could cultivate a kinder mind. Turned out, my mind needed some drastic spring cleaning and a lot of rearranging. Spring cleaning your brain is hard work; you have to do the sort of tidying that actually looks underneath the carpet. But when you do, you finally realize who you are beneath all the fear. It is there I found my truest, wildest, most authentic self. She’d been hidden for years, since childhood.As a little girl, I took on the belief that I wasn’t good enough as I am and spent twenty years in search for evidence to confirm my own worthlessness. But I didn’t need to do this anymore. I began to see how differently life could look with a new lens and how different it could sound without a constant stream of self-critical thoughts. I no longer needed to be an audience to that. None of us do.

“Poppy’s powerful approach will help you take control of your thoughts so they don’t control you.”—Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone READ MORE »

Order Happy Not Perfect      Penguin Random House ▸

 BONUS OFFER

Preorder your copy of Happy Not Perfect by Poppy Jamie (hardcover or ebook from any retailer) and upload your receipt information to receive bonus gifts including:

• Free access to Poppy Jamie’s 10-session Manifesting Workshop
• Four exclusive audio meditations guided by Poppy
• A sneak-peek excerpt from the book